My attempt to twin with Leah

Chock full of beans after dinner

They all wanted to try my earl grey latte because of the cute 3D art 

After one sip... ewww..  不好喝的

Too bitter for them.

Elliot: 为什么你们喜欢order这么难喝的drinks啊?

以后我长大我要order很好喝的 ice lemon tea.

Father and son matchy top, bought from BKK

Dark chocolate cake and strawberry shortcake.

Gobbled down the cake within minutes.

真不懂得欣赏 tsk tsk..

Elliot loves strawberries, and everything strawberry.

Strawberry pocky, strawberry hello panda, strawberry ice cream, strawberry chocolate and the list goes on..

Leah eats black forest cake

God sees you no matter where you are.

我不难过 这不算什么

只是为什么 眼泪会流 我也不懂

Went for my morning jog earlier and felt so emotional when I started having flashbacks of yesterday's worship and sermon. I felt God has spoken to me through His message, on dealing with shame and guilt.

“[Zacchaeus] was too short … [but] when Jesus got to the tree, he looked up …”Luke 19: 3, 5 (NIV)

Luke 19 records that when Jesus passed this spot, he looked up and noticed Zacchaeus. Can you imagine how Zacchaeus’ heart started pounding at that moment? Jesus was looking at him – this small, despised, insignificant man.

Why did Jesus stop at that tree and look at him? Because he knew that’s exactly where Zacchaeus was.

God knows exactly where you are too. He knew where you were an hour ago and he knows where you will be tomorrow. You may feel like you’re up a tree right now in your life. God knows where you are. You may feel like you’re out on a limb; Jesus knows. You may feel all alone, but Jesus stops and notices. You are not forgotten; you are not alone.

No tear has ever been hidden from him. No hurtful word said to you has ever passed that he missed. No abuse has ever occurred that he didn’t see and grieve with you. He sees it all.

This song was on my mind during our dearest Aunt Julia's hospitalisation and I felt the lyrics even more when the congregation sang it yesterday and I started to tear. Thank you God for your love and grace.

Everything was done so you would come.

Before the world began  

You were on His mind

And every tear you cry  

Is precious in His eyes

Because of His great love

He gave His only Son

Everything was done

So you would come

Nothing you can do

Could make Him love you more

And nothing that you've done

Could make Him close the door

Because of His great love

He gave His only Son

Everything was done

So you would come

Come to the Father

Though your gift is small

Broken hearts, broken lives

He will take them all

The power of the Word

The power of His blood

Everything was done

So you would come

Ending our Sunday on a sweet note

The pastries at Ciel Patisserie is such great indulgence that we signed up for the membership at our first visit.

Thanks for sweetening up my day, dear.

My $5.90 Beauty and the Beast pouch is too chio. I'm using it as a wallet to contain my cash, card and mobile phone. 

Bought it from Giant hypermart Tampines.

GUDETAMA MOONCAKE

Thank you Russell 舅舅 for getting us this super cute 蛋黄哥哥月饼 太太太...破费了 不过感觉好幸福啊  :)

We should all visit the Gudetama restaurant together soon...

Quick playground time!

It really doesn't take much to be happy. 

Getting back to life and routine

To be honest, the past few days have been awfully painful. I woke up feeling like an empty shell, and tears would simply flow down most unexpectedly. I cried when I was making milk for Leah, when I was walking the kids to school, and even when I'm putting food in my mouth. I shrugged off the comments at the kindergarten about my swollen eyes with reasons like lack of sleep.

Many times, I find myself replaying conversations and decisions in my mind, asking myself if I should have done things differently. I can't seem to feel my real feelings too. I see my kids playing and laughing away but I was so numbed with my emotion to even feel their happiness. I lay on the bed and fell asleep a few times due to excessive crying under the pillow. Maybe, it's not my privilege to be happy anymore.

Things have been smooth sailing all my life 没有过什么大波折 so I don't know how to cope with all these sudden sadness. I hate my current state and I know I need to draw myself out of this depression. Life needs to go on and this is unacceptable. I'm also glad to have my dear family to support and cheer me on. The encouragement texts I've received from my dear cousins, sorry I didn't reply to all, but I thank you from the bottom of my heart for your love, meant so much to me. To my MIL, who is the most understanding and my hubby for always being there for me. [I've tortured him with lots of crying.] Thanks dear.

Just wanna tell you guys, I'm okay.

Missing you so much, Aunt Julia

Today, the funeral has come to an end but you live on in our thoughts and hearts. We all love you so much.

 大姑妳很美，妳的心更美!

Comforted to know you are resting peacefully in paradise. I look forward to meet you again, my dear aunt.

My eulogy to my dearest 大姑

Julia 是我的大姑， 我想分享一些我和大姑以前的一些回忆

我和姐姐是在Lor Ah Soo长大的。Lor ah Soo 那里很热闹 有公公 嫲嫲, 大姑 小姑，Uncle Lester, Ah Kwang 叔叔 和 Ah Hwee 叔叔

小时侯的印象 是大姑的家务是永远做不完的 我每次都看她在洗碗 不然就是在洗衣服 而且是用洗衣板洗

大姑很省吃俭用 我记得她每次出门穿来穿去都是那几件 她不舍得花钱给自己买东西 但她对别人都绝不吝啬

我9岁那年， 我妈妈就请了个帮佣 把我们都接回家去.  我和姐姐每个拜六就会从Simei 塔 MRT 搭 bus去Lor Ah Soo 就是为了住一晚

那时大姑也开始出去做工了 她在Orchard卖Parker pen。然后她看到我们就会给我们零用钱 $5/$10 这样给 以前的$5/$10 是很大的. 回想起这些就觉得她真的好疼爱我们

我15岁翘课和同学跑去ice skating 跌短了左手臂 医生给我MC一个月 在这段期间是大姑在照顾我 她煮给我 带我去check up, 去 appointment, 去做 physiotherapy 但她也从来没有一次埋怨我麻烦

让我记忆最深刻的是在2011年的年头 她得了cancer. 那时我在Sweden, 我怀孕了。 5月份的时候，我生了我的第一台 我的家婆 她飞来帮忙我做月。

然后大姑从新加坡打电话来 她找我 我在休息 她就和我家婆说不要紧，不用叫醒她 给她去睡。 然后她就一直不停的谢谢我的家婆 感激她 还说God派一个天使 把我照顾到这样好

当我知道这件事情后 真的是忍不住 在房间大哭 I felt so ashamed of myself 因为我在Sweden的时候 没有很关心她的状况也不常打电话给她

我让一个正在chemo, fight cancer 的大姑来担心我.  这是让我很感动但也很难过的 因为她是如此的爱我 但我却没有为她做些什么

她总是在为别人着想 而忽略了自己 每次见面她都会说 她很好 这就是她的性格 她不要我们担心 也不喜欢别人为了她的事情忙碌9

从2011到2017, 她 fight cancer 6年多，复发了2次， chemo是做了又做。 副作用 ulcer，手脚麻痹， 和看到自己最宝贝的头发不停的掉下来 她过的很辛苦 但她不放弃

她和我们说: 我要活! 我要活下去!
她的意志力太令我佩服了

大姑 虽然你离开了我们 我们也很舍不得妳 不过我感到非常的安慰 你已经在一个很快乐的地方 那里只有喜乐 没有痛苦

大姑你永远活在我们的❤中 我们会很想念你 但我也知道有一天我们会再见面的

Day 1: Hello Bangkok!

Our long aniticipated vacay is finally here.

This time we checked in to Grand Diamond Suites Hotel, right next to the Platinum Fashion mall. 

We booked their newly renovated Luxury Suite.

Nice!!!

GW is very satisfied with the toilet.

Yes, he's very particular when it comes to toilets and it's always his priority and concern when picking hotels.

He will be like: toilet 美不美?

What a view from the bath tub. 

会不会被偷看到ah?

Having our first meal in Bangkok.

Dinner at Coffee bean by Dao.

We are such routine guys, we always go back to the same places for meals. And after browsing through the whole menu for a good 10 minutes, we ordered the same dishes we always do.

This curse is hard to break.

Their food never fails.

We shared shrimp padthai, green curry with prata and minced meat & shrimp rolls.

We shopped for a bit, bought some stuff for our dear kids [miss them so much!] then rested our feet at a cafe.

Mr Jones orphanage cafe because routine guys.

Our wefie :)

Chamomile tea and chocolate lava cake.

The night ended with loads of street food packed and enjoyed at our hotel room...